|My latest adventure. Hope in 30 little packets.|
As I explained yesterday, I finished my box of pink hyaluronic pills which were supposed to make my skin appear nine percent more elastic and plump-y. In order to get the full 27 percent improvement promised I would have to spend 80 Euros for two more months of the “all natural” treatment.
I decided to move on. This is where my story gets interesting. . .
Sunday night as I was reading my Figaro Madame with page after page of information on the latest and the greatest tricks for weight loss I discovered a product that might — just might — be the miracle for which I’ve been searching my entire life.
It’s something or other you swallow, in pill form, before lunch and dinner that makes your stomach think it’s full and therefore quells any sensations of hunger. As you’ve no doubt surmised, I sped to the pharmacy to see if Christine stocked the stuff. According to the article, my new life would begin by taking two capsules of Activateur Minceur Oenobiol with a large glass of water.
According to Christine, it would not. She refused to order them for me because she said, “I’m not sure what’s in them. I’m not selling them to you.” Of course I started to whine, but before I could really get into it she confessed that just last week she had met with a new laboratory that has a safe product (read plants) that would produce the results I seek.
Engyslim is a powdery something in individual sachets. It is to be sprinkled into a large glass of water, stirred and drunk 15 minutes before a meal. It looks light green sludge, but doesn’t have a particularly offensive taste. I would drink it even if it did taste like green sludge. When I get an idea in my head; I follow through.
This is what is listed in the ingredients (I’m not translating, I have to work on my book): psyllium d’Inde, acacia fibres, poudre d’Opuntia ficus indica (figuier de barbarie), extrait de Garinia cambogia (garcinia), aromes naturels, vinaigre de pomme, extrait de artichaut, spiruline, bicarbonate de potassium, stevia, chlorure de chrome.
Christine told me the chrome was important for appetite control. Who knew? When I asked her if I should have some chrome pills she just rolled her eyes.
|I used S. Pellegrino to dissolve my packet. The result looked something like bubbly green pond scum. But it tasted fine.|
It’s too early to tell you how it works, but rest assured I’ll be back to you with the results.
I asked Christine if I will experience any unpleasant side effects — it seems to have lots of fiber and you know what that means. She said if I followed the instructions and didn’t act like “a crazy American pill popper (no offense),” all would be well.
She also suggested as I rushed out the door with my precious package clutched to my bosom that it wasn’t necessary that I discuss our conversation on my blog. I explained it was absolutely necessary, that she’s responsible for some of my best material.